Another City, Another Time, Another Love
by X-Kelly-X
Summary: Just a 'lil GSR, kind of AU fic. Pretty light reading. Grissom and Sara meet again, but they're both otherwise attached. New chapter added!
1. Chapter 1

Title: Look Like We Made It

Rating: T, for this chapter anyway...

Disclaimer: Don't own the characters.

A/N: Each chapter will switch beetween Grissom and Sara's thoughts. Kind of AU, and not my best, it was just something that came to me. Song used in this chapter is Barry Manilow - Looks Like We Made It.

"Oh my God…"

Three words. That's all it took, I knew it was her, I shouldn't have turned around but I couldn't help it, I needed to see for myself. She looked beautiful, her hair was longer than when she was in Vegas and she looked, well, she looked healthy, she'd lost that haunted look and I couldn't help but wonder if it was my fault she was haunted in the first place. That's when I noticed the man on her arm, looking as though he belonged there, but he didn't, that was my place.

"Honey, aren't you going to introduce me to your friend?" Crap! That would be Gloria, my wife of five years. Wow , that makes it six years since I left Sara…

"Sure, this is Sara, a former colleague of mine from Vegas, Sara, this is my wife Gloria."

"And this is my boyfriend Karl," everyone shook hands and exchanged greetings, I prayed that would be it and we could all get on with our lives, apparently today was not my lucky day.

"Nice to meet you Gloria, so, Grissom what are you doing in town?"

"My mother owns this gallery, I promised her we'd come visit the exhibition, so here we are. How about you?"

"Oh, y'know, just needed a vacation, Karl's a bit of an art fanatic, so I brought him here."

"Good choice, of course, I may be biased." see, I could do this, it was fine, we'd chat, and go our separate ways. No, that's too easy, of course that wouldn't…

"Hey, since we're all here, why don't we go grab some food? I know a great restaurant just down the street. What d'ya think?"

No Karl, shut up Karl, don't go there Karl, my mind screamed, but what could I say, so I politely accepted and we began our walk to the restaurant, of course, in hindsight, it doesn't seem that bad, but still, at the time my heart was punding and my pakms were sweating. She was back in my life, whether I liked it or not, and I so wanted us to go back to being friends, lovers. I wanted her to feel the same, deep down I knew she did, but I also knew she'd hidden her feelings for me in her heart, under lock and key, never be be disrupted or discovered, until now.

There you are  
Lookin' just the same as you did,  
Last time I touched you  
And, here I am  
Close to gettin' tangled up  
Inside the thought of you

Do you love him  
as much as I love her  
And will that love be strong  
When old feelings start to stir

Looks like we made it  
Left each other on the way,  
To another love   
Looks like we made it  
Or I thought so, till today  
Until you were there everywhere  
And all I could taste was love  
the way we made it

"Oh my God…"

It couldn't be him, no, not now, not just as I was starting to make my life mine again. It was though, I didn't even mean to say it out loud. My heart ached, I wouldn't believe it, he was here, in front of me, again.

Six years? Yeah, six, wow, he looks good, not so tired and worn out. I guess he's settled down, by the look of that rock on that woman's finger, that could've been me. No, I can't go there again, not now, I mean, he was married, but are they happy?

God, so many memories, of loving, holding, kissing, just being, yet for all the happiness in the end it wasn't enough. Yet him being here now, I could feel it all again, I couldn't fight it away this time. I never let him go, and he hasn't said his final goodbye to me yet, there's just too much between us, even if it's buried deep within him, it's still there, right?

Okay, so we said "hi", that'd be it right, it was a coincidence, so his mother owned the gallery, how was I meant to know? Maybe I wanted to see him, that look in his eyes when he saw me, longing? No, not longing, he's too strong for that, but want, yeah. I have to say, it felt good, to see he still wanted me, but no I have Karl, Karl, who just had to open his big mouth.

So there we were, walking with our respective other halves, down some brightly lit San Fran street, towards my… well, my what? Destiny? No, I don't believe in that, I like to thinking I have more control then that. Towards my future, that's where I was going, I just didn't know it yet.

Love's so strange  
Playin' hide and seek, with hearts  
And always hurtin'  
And we're the fools   
Standin' close enough to touch  
Those burnin' memories

And if I hold you  
For the sake of all those times  
love made us lose our minds  
Could I ever let you go

Oh, no...we made it  
Left each other, on the way  
To another love  
Looks like we made it  
Or I thought so, till today  
Until you were there   
everywhere  
And all I could taste was love  
the way we made it


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: I know I said it was going to switch bewtween Sara and Grissom mid chapter, but I changed my mind and thought they should have a chapter each, this one is Grissom, next will be Sara, etc...

So here we are, together and yet not. That's how it always was I suppose, we fit so perfectly and yet we never really knew each other. I only wish it could be me holding her hand under the table. I can't believe this is happening, I tried so hard to forget all of this, forget the pain, and the heartache and the arguments. I have a happy marriage, it's average, it's normal, does that make it boring?

I remember when I was with Sara life was never boring , I remember once she got bored on her day off, and I came home to find our bedroom re-painted.

_I walked in the door, I'd just wrapped my case and all I wanted to do was curl up with her. The smell of pain assaulted my nostrils and I wondered what the hell she'd done this time. I followed the sound of her singing to our bedroom, it's funny how I can still remember the song (Kelly Clarkson - You Found Me). I walked up to the door and just took her in, she was wearing just one of my big old sweatshirts and she was covered in lemon coloured paint._

"_Ahem"._

"_Oh… umm… I got bored. You like it?"_

"_Yes… you got bored? So you painted the bedroom?"_

"_Yeah…" she moved closer to me, slowly, almost painfully slow, unbuttoned my shirt and moved against me, claiming my mouth, and with it my soul…_

Boring was never an emotion in the Sidle/Grissom household, it was all happiness and smiling and love-making for the first 3 years. Then came the fights, I guess we were both stubborn, neither would accept the other's point of view. I can still remember why it ended, it seems so silly now. We were arguing over where we should go on holiday, pathetic, I know, she wanted to go to Miami, I wanted to got o the rainforest and she accused me of loving my bugs more than I loved her. So I told her if that's how she felt she should get out, so she did, and it's not that I didn't fight for her, I tried so hard. After she handed in her notice to Ecklie I gave up, that was it, there was nothing more I can do, so two weeks later she was gone. So I cleared out her stuff, from both my house and my heart.

Over all the years I'd been without her, I'd always wondered what she was doing with her life, but no matter how hard I searched, she seemed to have made herself invisible. That's why it's so unbelievable, me sitting right across the table, close enough to touch, but not close enough to feel.

"So, Grissom, what're you up to now? Still in Vegas".

"Yeah, I teach at the university and occasionally consult for the crime lab. Bugs. You know". At that comment her face seemed to stiffen,

"Yes, I know".

Hmm, so maybe she remembers it as well, I wonder if she ever thinks about it. Probably not, she never tried to get into contact with me, and she knew where I was.

"So, Karl." says Gloria, "what do you do?"

"I'm a surgeon up in Seattle. We live there now. Cardiac surgeon actually."

Surgeons still make me shudder. I think Sara notices the flash of pain in my eyes. That case still haunts me.

"Wow, impressive. And Sara? Still a CSI?"

"Yeah, supervisor now, it's great, apart from the paper work. Now I understand why Griss was always at the lab so late…"

She seemed to think she'd said something wrong, although I don't think anyone else noticed. Lost in my thoughts again, I think back to that case, strange, I can't even remember her name, but I remember his alright. Vincent Lurie. After that night, I knew I had to do something, so I did, I tried anyway, for weeks. Then after what happened to Nick I realised how short life is. So I went for it, a year later we were living together. 4 years after that she left. Around a year after that I married Gloria. Some would say I moved too fast, but I just wanted to get over Sara, I suppose it hasn't really work, even now.

"Y'know what, I'm tired baby, I'm gonna head back to the hotel, you stay though, I'm sure you probably have loads to catch up on", what? NO!

"Okay, I'll just come back with you."

"Don't be silly, you stay, talk, I'll see you later."

Oh God, now I have to make conversation.

"So, Sara, did you keep in contact with Nick and Greg?"

"I did, a lot, still email at Christmas and stuff, but we're not so close anymore, it's a shame, I really miss them both."

"You know, you're welcome back anytime you like…"

"I'll think about it…"

Even small talk holds so much tension for us, how hard can this be?

"It's getting late, I should probably get back to the hotel, it was great seeing you again",

"Yeah, us too. It was good to catch up, so, I guess I'll see you around?"

"Hey! Why don't we do this again tomorrow?"

No Karl shut up!

"Actually, I promised I'd go to my mothers for dinner, sorry."

"Oh well that's ok, whatcha doing for lunch?"

"Well, umm…"

"Great! We'll meet you at the coffee shop next door, oh, and I've got the cheque tonight, I insist."

I can't help but notice how uncomfortable Sara looks, but what can I do? It would be impolite to refuse. I'll go tomorrow and that'll be it, over. Again.


	3. Chapter 3

-1Lunch? What was he thinking?

"Since when is it your business to ask out my friends for lunch?" I use the term "friend" loosely.

"I just thought you guys would like to catch up, y'know, you talk about his sometimes, you obviously used to be close. Listen, I'm sorry, I just thought since you've been so down lately you could use some cheering up…"

"Next time let me deal with it, I'm going home, I guess I'll see you tomorrow for lunch."

By home I meant the B&B my brother still runs. With both my parents now dead we reconciled, now we have each other.

I know I acted irrationally, but it was upsetting knowing that I could be so close and yet our minds so far apart. Sometimes I wonder where it all went wrong, although I suppose deep down I know it was when we both started pulling doubles, we barely saw each other, and when we did all we did was have sex. It was the only way to forget about everything else that was happening to us, we could just get lost inside each other…

Six years ago I locked away all my feelings, in the depth of my heart, never expecting them to be revisited. So here I am, reminiscing. It was amazing, being with him. He was everything I ever wanted and once he got used to "us" he wasn't afraid to show he felt the same way. I didn't give him a choice, just handed in my notice and went. I never wanted to know what would happen if we said goodbye, not until now.

I wish I could find out if there could ever be an "us" again, but he's got his wife, and I'm happy with Karl, I am. Maybe not forever, but it's comfortable, and it's loving, more than anything. Every now and again, when me and Karl are together, I imagine it's Grissom touching me, kissing me. But it's not. Grissom knew where to touch me to make me squirm, Karl doesn't do that. I remember once, it'd been a long shift for me so when I came home he massaged all the kinks out of my back…

_I came in from my shift late, it'd been a long night. I found him sitting up waiting for me, and I don't think we even spoke, he just knew. He started by massaging my shoulders, then moved down to my spine and lower back. He repeated this a few times, all the while I was almost moaning in pleasure. I loved the way his hands felt against my skin, the way he smelled like soap, just plain soap._

_He turned me round to face him and claimed my mouth, he tasted like maple syrup and I wanted to just melt into him. By now I was straddling him, and he wrapped my legs around his waist and carried me down the hall to our bedroom, he laid me down and kept eye contact with me the whole time while he took his shirt and pants off. Then he took off my shirt and bra and took one nipple into his mouth, I moaned with the contact and arched up into him, needing to feel him._

_He slowly, almost painfully unzipped my pants and took my panties off with them. As he lowered himself onto me I pulled him up and spoke the first words of the night. "No, I need you now, time for that later."_

_He complied, and took my mouth again as he pressed himself slowly into me. It was over whelming, even though we'd done it dozens of times before, I was still amazed that Grissom was inside me, we were joined and as we moved together, a tangle of limbs, I knew he loved me. He was willing to show his soul to me, willing to let me know how he felt, willing to share his life with me. _

_I still remember how he felt as he moved inside me, in a rhythm only we knew. As we moaned each other's names when we came, I thought this is where I was going to be for the rest of my life. How quickly things change._

I remember why I left, bugs. He wanted bugs, I wanted romance. Simple. But then, when was anything ever simple between us? "Pin me down", simple, yet so many complicated undertones. Maybe it was my own fault, I was the one who had to start talking about that fucking promotion! Why, why, why?

I had to do something about this, had to talk to him before lunch tomorrow. No, there can't be anything, not now, not again. We've got our separate lives. It's over. Again.

"Hello, Crowne Plaza. How can I help?"

"Hi there, I'm looking for someone, Dr. Gil Grissom, I was wondering if you could help me?"

It was a guess, it's the only hotel within walking distance…

"Okay, if I could take your name I'll dial up to his room for you."

"It's Sara Sidle, if you could just ask him to meet me in the lobby in 10 minutes that'd be great."

"Okay, I'll do that for you, thanks for calling. Bye."

"Thanks. Bye."

Fuck.

I just walked, didn't give myself time to think, and there he was looking slightly disorientated and confused. But he was there, that was the main thing.


End file.
